man I've felt nothing but sadness the past few days I'm questioning if life is truly worth living again (not uncommon for me dw)
School has been overworking me to the point where I can hardly keep track of what homework I have anymore, and overall 2025 has been extremely stressful for me lately. February was the worst month of my life and if I'm being honest April is up there too so far.
Oh and I didn't even mention the best part, when summer break rolls around it doesn't even last until August so by mid-July I'll be back in school and I'll be doing this all over again, awesome right! Meanwhile my best friends don't get out until late June and they go until September, meaning I get to spend at max 2 and a half weeks with them before descending into hell again, while they get to spend like 10 weeks together and I miss out on everything. Genuinely school feels like a prison, I hardly get any decent time off and I get no time to spend with my friends.
Oh yeah and did I mention school gives us a test or quiz EVERY WEEK? I HAVE ADHD AND AUTISM, YOU THINK I CAN KEEP UP WITH THAT? Oh and the cherry on top, they give us homework AFTER I just spent my entire life's supply of brainpower trying to process everything on the test!
Nothing truly feels fun anymore and I would honestly rather be dead than live through half of what I have to live through. Heck, I'm probably already dead and this is what hell is! People complain about me being hard on myself all the time when THIS is what I have to live through on a daily basis. Pretty sure if anyone else was in my situation they'd act the same way, who knows tbh it's probably just me isn't it
sorry guys I just needed a place to vent rn since I'm in school and can't vent anywhere else (thanks so much for banning phones school haha you're so amazing frfr)
